You have many Mother & Father figures…
Learn from them all.
In our lifetime we are gifted multiple mother & father figures, if you’re open to seeing them, recognising them, knowing them, being them.
We are born into our family, gifted our own Mum & Dad to raise us, nurture us, love us in the way that they know. Family is community. That community widens & changes as we grow, as we step into more responsibility of our own, and it’s in our communities that we meet more of our mother & father figures…And there’s a reason for this.
(Ha…as I sit with this idea, I see many paths leading off it, many examples, so let’s see where this goes. My mind is this beautiful maze that I do my best to bring it back to the simplest form.)
We can not be everything to our children (or others for that matter), we can only be who we are for them, that’s our gift to them. Trying to be everything to and for them will only ruin you, tire you. Trying to mould & shape them to be who you think they should be, will only ruin & tire them. They are not ours to own, we are simply a guide, doing our best to guide them to be their most genuine, individual selves – that’s their gift to us.
This is why it’s so important to learn & know the core of yourself, to learn what’s you & what’s not you, to learn to stand in your own skin, in your own truth, so that all your natural gifts can flow from you with ease and be shared with others. The moment you try to force yourself to be someone/something you’re not, it’s felt – and that’s where friction occurs inside yourself & with others. Come to your truth and you will accept others truths. Come to your truth and you will guide from your truth.
Then look to the world…and let your children look to the world.
Be it to their grandparents, aunties, uncles, step-parents, friends, work colleagues, bosses, neighbours, mentors…Who have their own gifts to share, to pass down.
It may be a skill, a belief, a way of being or a simple sentence that lands well on the ear. Learn & teach to listen to the heart and to know goodness when it’s seen or heard. Many bring gifts to support us in our wholeness.
Let’s look at it in real life.
Baking, tech & too much structure – are just a few things that throw me, that requires a lot more prep in my mind to do, I don’t thrive in doing or being in these spaces. It curdles my stomach.
Yet doing or being in conversations around creativity, expression, business ideas, philosophy – oh I’m one lite up woman…and that’s who I show up as for my kids. They can and have learnt baking, tech, structure and many other things from others, and for that I’m grateful for, as it’s not what I’m here to truly share with them.
Know what you bring to the table in every relationship you have…be it as a parent, a friend, with family, with a partner – being in your truth is your gift to them, just as them being in their truth is a gift to you.
Let 2025 be a year you let go of what’s not you and step into who you really are.
Into a space where you feel whole and liberated by life – in whatever way that looks for you. You never know who’s heart you may touch, who’s life may shift simply by being you’re amazing self.